Caring Today Community -

• My Story

...I have an Aunt who lives just a few minutes from us in a Seniors Only apt. complex. She lives alone and had macular degenration and is taking prozac for depression.

She has always had an edge to her, prone to speak her mind and has a history of alienating people. She is 83 years old and has increasingly gotten very aggressive and angry, saying incredibly hurtful things, paranoid about being taken advantage of, second guessing care givers motivations, has gone through 4 different caregivers in one year and has now told me that she does not want anything to do with me or my husband. I have given the apt. manager my card in case he needs to reach me. She has another niece who only stops by a couple times a week, neighbors and one friend I know of.

Any suggestions on what to do or do I simply do nothing? I love her and wish she would understand that, but it is getting really scary to stop by. I had tried to do things for her but she always imagines I have ulterior motives for bringing her flowers, food, etc... Please help.

Hello. My name is Victoria. I first started caring for my own mother when I was a junior in high school. She was very termially ill. My senior year was spent at home taking my subjects and she was in a wheelchair watching me graduate. I was in my first year of law school when she passed. I then began feeling as if law school wasn't a career for me. I then began caring for other families with ailing loved ones. I now and have for the last 20 years cared for several people in long term and skilled care facilities. At the present time, my husband and I have his father to consider for a very tough situation. This is his second serious fall in the past year. He had a stroke some several years ago during a heart surgery. He is very independent and lives alone. Well he fell a few days ago in the snow and very cold temps getting his paper. He laid for an hour outside and had broken his hip. He is not someone who will live with us or have someone come and stay with him. He thinks of himself as a burden if he were to need us. We are only to need him. He is still in the hospital recovering from his hip surgery. He is 83 years young and very determined to be on his own. They have discussed a rehabilitation center and he has agreed to come for care where I work, but as long as I get him home as soon as possible. We just don't know what will come afterward. We don't know how to approach the subject that it isn't safe to be alone any more. He will not use an emergency button either. He doesn't feel he needs it yet. We are just all at a loss of what's next. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.