2008 “Give a Caregiver a Break” FIRST-PRIZE WINNER: Morton
"The Family Coach"
Photography by Fran Collin
My wife of almost 54 years, Joyce, has Alzheimer's disease. Her abilities for daily living and cognitive function have declined considerably over the past five years. I am 76 years old and still maintain a consulting business. Needless to say, day-to-day caregiving for Joyce is exhausting but I feel it is the best quality of life for her.
Although I am Joyce's primary caregiver, I consider myself a coach with a great team that helps me. We have a wonderful aide, Angie, who comes in each week to help with some of Joyce's basic needs. Joyce and I both look forward to seeing her each Monday. Angie has become almost one of the family to us and I know I can rely on her in any emergency situation. Three days a week, Joyce attends a day program at Easter Seals. She enjoys the socialization and activities and it also gives me the ability to conduct my consulting business.
We began attending a support group shortly after Joyce's diagnosis. It has been so helpful in dealing with the day-to-day issues of the disease. There are so many challenges to deal with that I have found it beneficial to see how others have dealt with similar situations. It isn't always easy providing a hazard-free home for Joyce, but their prior experiences and ideas help me a lot. I hope that I in turn have provided them with helpful suggestions based on issues that I have needed to resolve.
Despite our daily challenges, our time together is still meaningful and special. We spend our spare time listening to music and singing along. Joyce's favorite is Frank Sinatra. We still enjoy hugging and sleeping in our queen sized bed everynight. We try to enjoy things like we used to, with necessary modifications. We thank God for every day we are able to share together and realize that our situation could be worse.
I hope I have inspired others to keep their loved ones at home. It is not always easy, but with the proper support system and commitment, it can be done. Joyce's smile and laughter make all of my hard work worthwhile.
In a few months, I will need to rebuild my support system. Our son who lived close to us in New Hampshire has relocated to Oregon. We will be moving to New Jersey to be close to our daughter and her family. We are hoping to establish a similar routine of a day program, home health aide and support group for Joyce since this has worked so well for us.
—Morton Blumenthal, Hookselt, NH
Winner of $2500 in free respite care
From Home Instead Senior Care